Not a creature was stirring, or making prank calls,
The booze bottles were stacked in the stadium with care,
In hopes that The Chairman soon would be there;
The Iron Googlers were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of challenges danced in their heads;
And The Acolytes, in their robes and their caps
Had just settled down for a small nanna-nap
When out in the stadium, there arose such a clatter,
They sprang from their beds to see what was the matter.
Away to the window they flew like a flash,
Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.
When, what did they see come out of the fog?
But a miniature sleigh, and forty pug dogs,
With a regal driver, so wise and fair, man
They knew in a moment it must be The Chairman!
More rapid than eagles his pugdogs, they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;
"Now, Reschs! Now, Sideburns! Now, Manning and Whiskey!
On, Poker ! On Man-of-the-North! On, Nerdgames and Frisky!
To the top of the stadium! to the top of the wall!
Now dash away! dash away! dash away all!"
As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,
When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky,
So around the stadium, the pugdogs they flew,
With the sleigh full of gifts, and The Chairman too.
And then, The Acolytes heard on the floor
The prancing and shuffling of each little paw
As they drew back their hands, and were turning around,
To the floor of the Stadium, The Chairman, he bound.
He was dressed all in black, from his head to his boot
Except for his shirt, which was paisley (and cute!)
He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
And filled all the booze-bottles; then turned with a jerk,
And spreading his arms, he encompassed the room
And waving his hands, cast light into the gloom
He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,
And up they all rose like the down of a thistle.
But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight,
"It’s Challenge time, get out of bed you lazy bastards”
Iron Googlers, your last challenge for 2009 is...
Santa's Naughty List: Exhibit A